Overflowing

1. "God, I see it's time to prune; / This will all be over soon... /
But, I pray thee, help us all, / (Je)HOvah, on thy name I call! /


2. There is so much I don't know, / Which, at certain times doth show! /
But I thank thee for thy grace, / As, another day, we face! /


3. I want to be wise - discreet! / And, to always, others, treat; /
Just the way that I would want, / Lest weeds grow up and - me - haunt! /


4. Putting my-self in their shoes? / Told me that it - me - behooves... /
To, the "pruning shears" get out - / That, beyond the slightest doubt! /


5. So, I made a firm decision, / To, of past posts, make revisions! /
And I pray that they'll reflect, / I appreciate respect! /


6. And I don't want - it - to lose! / To thy glory, do, me, use! /
And help me to be grown up, / Overflowing IS my cup! :)


Sincerely,

Daniel

"The Writing on the Wall"...

... I must say, sometimes I like the writing on the wall better than others. That, however, is not going to stop me from reading it; and acting on it. It says, to let go of what I have been hanging onto; and I accept that. "God, I'm 'letting it go'. Bless my friends for their understanding. Remember them for this; and give them the desire of their heart. In Jesus' name; amen!"


Sincerely,


Daniel

Will This Really Happen?... - revised

I certainly pray so and hope so! "God, please help me and 'Show me the way to go'! I don't want to unpleasantly shock anyone. I do, however, want to please thee, and be a blessing.




"-38,148,008,924,359.1, -218,221,311!"


Daniel

"How can that be yesterday..."? - revised

..."if"...



Daniel

"unPLANNED"

I borrowed this book from the library, and have to give it back tomorrow. If I can finish reading it today and tomorrow; I will! It certainly is an eye-opening journey. Some day I would love to write: "A Tale That is Told" - the story of my life. If it could do for others what Abby Johnson's story is currently doing for me; then I pray I will be able to do it!

Sorry! - revised

Any indiscretion has certainly not been by my design.


Sincerely,



Daniel

OK!... - revised

First of all: a video! http://www.godtube.com/watch/?v=02CEECNU&utm_source=GodTube%20Must-See%20-%20Mobile&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=02/20/2015

It (the video) was so absolutely awesome! Here! I just wrote a poem - but I wrote it on a crumpled up piece of scrap paper I fished out of my backpack. I needed to write poetry - right at that moment, and that was the piece of paper I found:

1. God! My debts are paid! Hooray! / Help me lift my head, I pray!
For I'm feeling, oh! So spent! / My! Oh My! This paper's bent!

2. 아버지 ("Ah-Beoh-Jeeh!" (meaning: "'Abba' Father")), Help me not worry!/ Also, not be in a hurry! /
Help me HOPE! BELIEVE! REJOICE!/ Here and now, I MAKE THAT CHOICE! /

3. I, my hopes, am getting UP! / Is this called for? I say, "YU... ...UP!" /
But it's risky! I'm afraid! / Of get-ting, again, low-laid!

4. I don't - dis-ap-point-ment - want, / Doth the thought of it, me, haunt! /
But, "HEAD? UP!" I CHOOSE to SMILE! / Gladly go the extra mile! /

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSH3Q6O_7w8

Hallelujah, indeed!

Again, though: when they sing of being bought with Jesus' blood; I acknowledge - I likely don't believe it quite the way they do. As I have said, I believe... in my own way. See? If I believe in the "blood atonement" - then I believe it I John 2:2-style! And I Timothy 4:10... AND ELEVEN!



Sincerely,



Daniel

Hooray for Mom! - revised

She just gave me a very helpful thought! "If they say no? Oh well! Life goes on!" I love that thought, and completely receive it! Again: "Hooray for Mom!"


P.S. Thank you, Mom, for that!

I copied these verses out last night: - revised

"The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree - they shall grow like a cedar in Lebanon. Those that be planted in the house of the LORD, or Jehovah, shall flourish in the courts of our God. They shall STILL BRING FORTH FRUIT in old age - they shall be FAT and FLOURISHING! To shew that the LORD, or Jehovah, is upright - he is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in him." Psalm 92:12-15 I love those verses! I take great encouragement from them.

As I have said, I would really like to see my dream come to pass, the way I am imagining; and I really want it to. I even have to admit, I cringe at the thought of disappointment; if for some reason, it is not able to go ahead. See: I've got a plan for seeing it brought to pass - but I don't know how it will be received.

This, however, is something God has been bringing to pass over the years - in my opinion. Here is what I am talking about:

I met this girl over seven years ago now. I held her that day; and, over the years, I have found God providentially providing opportunities to meet and get to know her. With her, I don't have to "figure out" what to do. All I have to do is be who I am.

I still remember driving from Alberta back to Winnipeg, and I just happened to be driving down the highway on "Son-Day" morning. I knew there was a church along the way; which I had been to before, and wouldn't mind visiting again - and it was about the time the morning meeting would be starting.

The problem was: remembering where to turn off the highway, to get there. I took what I thought was the correct turn, but didn't find the church. Of course, when you take a wrong turn like that, it takes you a while to realize that it cannot be the correct road. Therefore, I turned right, and then another right at the next road.

I was driving down the road back to the highway (by the way? I went through a sudden "drop" on THAT road, and sort of bottomed out my rental car!), I was feeling kind of perplexed (but I do think I was getting some consolation from perhaps Charles Stanley on the radio). I was driving along that road? And there was the church I was looking for! I had found it! I went in!

And - though I had NOT planned this AT ALL, there was this girls father (my friend)! They (his family) were obviously visiting his in-laws for the weekend and therefore at that same church! After the meeting, I was talking to my friend about how I had wound up there, when "another 'friend'" (my friend's WIFE, who is also a very dear friend of mine) "THUNDERED IN" on our conversation from behind/beside me! "HAAAWH-YEEH!" (In other words, "HI?" - but there is NO WAY that spelling does justice to the way she said it!) (Again, they are the parents of this girl).  It was both a happy and... "VERY MUCH WANTING TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON!" greeting!  When she had gotten more breath after "blowing me away" with her "greeting-and-interrogation-all-rolled-into-one"... and laughter, she continued it! "...WHAT'RE... YOU!.... DOING HERE!..." The good news? I had nothing to hide! I had gotten there by the grace and providence of God! I can understand, though, why she was suspicious! I mean, the timing was nothing short of miraculous! That was one small example of God allowing me to be there - even go to her parents' house for lunch after!

By the way, I am mortified by the way I carried on at her place, though! I remember being "outspoken", to say the least. "In the multitude of words, there wanteth not sin - but he that refraineth his lips is wise." (Proverbs) Well, to recite another Bible verse? "Lo - I have not refrained my lips, O LORD, or Jehovah - thou knowest." (Psalm 40:9) I would actually even apologize for my indiscretion there (and not just there, either!) if I had the chance. It is mortifying. Not that she gave me a hard time for that, which I thank her for!

I remember a different time (several years later), where I was going to drive out to my friends' place for a visit. I remember talking to my friend (the father) about our soon to happen visit; and I remember him saying, "You're probably going to want to play with the girls, right?" And I remember thinking: "Uh... Well, yeah... You mean, you're OK with me doing that? I mean, definitely! I would love you - but, yet again: you don't mind?" Well, obviously, they didn't, from what I could gather!

I had an amazing time, and - yes - I did play with their girls! It fell into place. That's all I can say. I loved it! I thank God for it - but I didn't make that happen. I simply showed up and - again - it fell into place.

More recently, I was flying back home, and was going to also visit my friends' place, and I wanted to bring a movie I had bought on Blu-Ray - but I didn't have a Blu-Ray player. The problem was, I hadn't been able to find the movie.

I didn't know if I would find it, but I looked for it - just before flying back (in my ROOM - and finding stuff in my room can be a real challenge!). I found it! Just like that! I asked ahead about watching the movie, and got encouraging feedback. Then, when I SHOWED it to them (when I arrived at their place), I still remember this girl seeing the Blu-Ray disc, and exclaiming, "...I LIKE this movie...!" Do you know: I had tried to get other people to watch that Blu-Ray with me? They hadn't been interested (though I HAD taken my MOM to see it in the theatre, and SHE HAD loved it!) For her to say that upon seeing the disc? And then to watch it with her, and experience the way she, indeed, totally enjoyed it? It was such a gift! (And that came after me getting BRUTALIZED by someone I had thought I could trust as someone to confide in, regarding very personal matters!)

One more story! I remember, when I was going to head out to "their place" on this girl's last birthday, and I decided I wanted to play a piano piece I had worked and worked to learn, years before. I practiced it over and over on my parents' piano before driving out. I simply remember thinking: I really want to place this song for them. The thing was? I didn't even realize there was any potential for them to not have a piano! Seriously! See, years before, they HAD had a piano in their home - and I suppose I was remembering that! Either way, they had NOT had a piano in their house for a LONG time!

This, however, did not mean they would not have a piano for me to play on! The only reason for THAT fact, though, was that - just DAYS before? They had "finally" wheeled a piano into their house! Seriously! My friends father has a "dolly", or something like it, for moving pianos! And he had brought it over, and helped them get a piano in there! Just before I came out! Joel Osteen talks about this! God having solutions for problems you didn't even know you had! I mean! I love that! I even love them - but I do want to (as I said in a previous post) give them breathing room too! I just love them so much, OK?

The last time I was at her place, though? I remember my friend (her father) explaining that his girls were downstairs watching a movie he had bought them. He invited me to come down and see how they responded when they realized I was there. We did go down, and they didn't even realize we were there (they were obviously concentrating intently on the movie).

My friend and I stood there to the side and watched the movie, along with them - again - them not realizing we were there. This reminds me of being in high school, and going to the University of Manitoba. A Chemistry professor was "showing off" some really fascinating chemistry demonstrations. One of them was two "powders" he mixed in a bowl. He was stirring the bowl under the "chimney" of the chemistry laboratory; explaining that it took several seconds for the two chemicals (i.e. powders) to react. So, he would stir, and pull back... Stir, and pull back - anticipating a reaction at any moment.

That was just like me standing there watching that movie - waiting for them to realize I was there. I didn't know what they would do. I hoped they would be glad to see me; but in that moment, all I could do was wait... and even hope. Well! Did I ever get a trip down memory lane! About thirty seconds to a minute later? This girl suddenly whirled her head sideways towards me and exclaimed?... Something I had only heard once in my life before...

"HAAAWH-YEEH!" (Again - "HI!" but, yet again, with accentuated spelling)... JUST!... LIKE!... HER!... MOTHER!... had said it back at her home-town church over seven years before! It was unmistakably uncanny!



I've said it before; and actually read it today again: "Boast not thyself of tomorrow - for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth." Proverbs 27:1. Do you know what I also read, though? The last few verses of that chapter! I just bought some RRSP's today - something I had not done in a LONG... LONG... time! See, there is also Proverbs 24:27 (I think): "Prepare thy work without, and make it fit for thyself in the field - and, afterwards, build thine house." I used to find that verse - and the kind of verses found at the end of Proverbs 27, depressing. It seemed like my work would NEVER be prepared without! That it would NEVER be fit for "myself" in the field. Now, however? God willing, I will see if I can even get a raise at work! Either way, I am encouraged.

Sincerely,

Daniel

I did it! But...

..."it" wasn't even close to what I was going to do! "That" was supposed to be the "thing that I threw together because what I had in mind was not even close to ready yet!" Oh, well! I think the "last minute" thing I did was actually plenty for "them" to chew on as it was! In fact, I really pray that God will give me the discretion to give "these people" the breathing room I know they need right now! I mean: it was intense, OK? I'm intense - but even I have to admit: the intensity reached a pretty good pitch there! All I can say? I meant it! Every word! Blessings!

Sincerely,

Daniel Robbins

Even though I was...

...scared... I'm not... worried! "Great peace have they which love thy law - and nothing shall offend them." (Psalm 119:165) Even having to let this dream die.. again, if I have to, shall not offend me. I admit - it's an agonizing thought; but nothing compared to the amazing blessings that I believe will come out of taking my shot - AND making it! See, I've taken "long shots" (to say the least) before!


Back in 2008, I discovered how to count to 31 on one hand, 1023 on two (see www.binfinco.blogspot.com); and far, far beyond. In fact, it was when I discovered I could get up to beyond 29,000... and then decided to count it through... that I... woke up! To a reality: I had had NO IDEA how much 29,000 was! Seriously, it felt like I would never finish.


It was after that that I decided to count to 1,048,576 (or 2 to the power of ten). After completing that in about half a year; I set my sights on 33,554,432 (or 1,048,576 times 32 - it was, at that time, the counting potential I had discovered on ONE HAND, with ONE FINGER! I, therefore, decided that the LEAST I could do was count to THAT!) I lived to wonder why I had set that goal, though - because my second "million" actually took two to three times longer than my first! It felt as though I would never get THERE! (By the way? A lot of my counting happened while walking or running to and from work.)


Honestly, there were times where I wondered if I would ever finish (approximately) 33.5 million. Again - honestly - I thought I might be working away at it for the rest of my life! Little by little, though, I discovered that I could not help but... accelerate! And that turned out to be the key to not only reaching my goal; but going as far beyond it as I could ever have cared to!


I still remember my niece, Emma, asking me if I could count to a billion - and I said, "Well, I don't think I'll ever count that far..." Then, the next time she saw me, she asked me about that again ("Uncle Daniel, you haven't counted to a billion, right?) - and I HAD just counted beyond a billion! (So, no - even I did not see that coming!)


Within five years, I counted to 897 duovigintillion (using the American system - not the British) - and, again, I had wondered if I would get to 33.5 million in my lifetime! That tells me I can afford to take "long shots" like this. Also? I do think I am in my rights, doing what I can to see this come to pass.


I mean, I am definitely pursuing my hearts desire - but I think God put it there; and that a LOT of people stand to benefit from my having the courage to "do what I can" (but - of course - not what I "can't").


I've already let this dream die - and, as far as I'm concerned, it has sprouted back up... again! And I welcome it back! I will do everything I can to see that it flourishes and comes to fruition!


Now, this weekend continues to march towards me, as I have said before; and I am not really feeling ready for it! I wanted to make something and get it in the mail - but it is taking me way more time than I thought! Therefore, God willing, I will send an "E-Card" and get the package in the mail as soon as possible!


I am so thankful to be busy, though! I remember living in Saskatoon, between paying jobs (perhaps I had been seasonally laid off by H and R Block). I "didn't have to do anything", and it was AWFUL! That is NOT the way things are right now, and I love that!


What I REALLY look forward to is, God willing, getting married to the "best-of-the-best", and then REALLY having to do all sorts of stuff! Again? "Bring it on!" For now, though: bring on the continued preparation I know God is making in me - and her.


Sincerely,


Daniel

I'm Scared... - revised

...Here's why: I just realized I have an aunt who is older than me, by just barely more than I am older than... "so-and-so". And, the other "so-and-so"? That age gap even leaves my aunt in the dust! It is thoughts like that that actually move me to pray, "God? I would really like this to happen - but I don't want it to, unless it is thy will; and unless there is some way I can stay as young as I have to, for my age, long enough and well enough to make this a good situation for HER! I don't want anything that is not going to be good for her! Again - I would really like this to happen; but 'onely' if it is thy will (and - again - good for her)! In Jesus' name, amen!"


Sincerely,


Daniel

Psalms and Proverbs Once a Month

http://www.psprom.blogspot.ca/

Here is another blog I created years ago, describing a schedule I have liked to use for reading, as the title says, "Psalms and Proverbs Once a Month". One interesting detail about this month, though, is that I have gotten a "day ahead" because this month only has 28 days! And it is a 30-day schedule! Therefore, my plan is to day, again, a "day ahead", "borrow" the first day of the next month (the third month, or "March"), and then be "a day behind" for the remainder of that month.

Blessings!

Daniel

"Outside the Camp"

http://www.outsidethecamp.blogspot.ca/

It just occurred to me to post the above link to the blog, "Outside the Camp"; which I started while living in South Korea. I thought I had better make as much information, about myself, as possible, available. Again - if I am reading "certain people" correctly; then I think they have a pretty good idea of what I am thinking. And, in that case? I want them to - again - gather as much information about me as possible.

Sincerely,

Daniel

It just ocurred to me...

...that I think I have actually "given myself away" pretty good here! I mean, on this blog! I was reading some of my past posts on here - and if the "right person" were to read those posts? I think "they" would have a pretty "jolly" good idea of what I am thinking - at least in general! This is sobering - and I know it has to be, for me; and I want that to be known. I take this seriously. I'll leave out the adverb I just about used - because I want to speak LIFE into this situation! Nevertheless, I want the appropriate people to know just how seriously I take this. Please: make no mistake! VERY! I think I'll let it suffice me to say that for now.

Blessings!

Daniel Robbins

Praying for wisdom!

I recall James 1:5. "If any man lack wisdom, let him ask of God, who giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not - and it shall be given to him." Here I go: "Abba! Father! Thank thee! Thank thee for helping me to move that mountain. It finally moved. I waited a long time for that to happen; and agonized over it - almost as much as I did over the mountain I had to move, back in South Korea. I thank thee, though, for the people who played a role on both mountains moving, and pray thy blessing on them. Let me be a blessing to them. Only a blessing. Show me how to be that, I pray, in Jesus' name!" Amen!


Sincerely,


Daniel

It's Gone!

I looked - and it's gone! The mountain moved! I am so thankful! Thank YOU to the person who played a part in that happening. THANK YOU for your respect! I take it very seriously, and even with fear and trembling! I never want to take it for granted. I do, however, want to continue to do whatever I legitimately can to be a blessing. I also do want to marry someone whom I love, and who also loves me. How exactly that is going to look, I know not (especially - again - as per Proverbs 27:1 "Boast not thyself of tomorrow, for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth.")


I am at my wits end, though; OK? Four decades is a LONG TIME to wait, so please do bear with me if I "chomp at the bit" from time to time. Nevertheless, I KNOW I must really watch myself, and I am doing so. I have been quoting this verse a lot these days: "A wise man feareth, and departeth from evil - but the fool rageth, and is confident." I do NOT want to be that fool! I want to FEAR! And DEPART from evil!


I quoted another verse, however, as well, to a beloved friend last night: "The wicked flee when no man pursueth, but the righteous are bold as a lion." This morning? With that Unitarian Minister? I stood my ground! I held fast my integrity - and I let him know so! I think he is case in point of society's prejudice against, well, men like me! Men who just plain cannot play along with what is considered "normal". When you're me? You learn to appreciate it when all you have to do is show up and be yourself. And you get complete acceptance and even love! I pray that it will be understood why this keeps me coming back for more. Everyone needs that - but not everyone gets that, to say the least. And at that Unitarian "Universalist" Church? I did NOT get that yesterday or today!


Not that I'm complaining! I love the idea of - at the very least - having that church as one of the many churches I can go to if I want (and, from time to time, God willing, I will pay them a visit - because I do see things in them that the rest of us need). But plug in there? Make that my home church? Forget it, pal!


I love the way God insists on my remaining WILD! Hallelujah! And it is NOT by my design! It is by HIS! I will say that until the cows come home! I have TRIED AND TRIED to "fit in" at all these different churches! God? He makes it clear in no uncertain terms that - again - he wants me WILD!


Here's what I love, though: SOME PEOPLE obviously have decided to make sure I don't ALWAYS have to be "out in the cold", and they make sure I always have a place of welcome! I love these people! And - again: I am going to do everything I can legitimately do to be a blessing to them! Even a "super-blessing"! What do I mean by "super-blessing"? Please, again, do bear with me - but: "Stay tuned..."


LOVE!


Daniel

"Lost in Space"

This was one of my favourite songs by "Platinum Blonde" back in the 1980's, and it came to mind; to try looking it up! Sure enough! I found an "audio video" as well as a LIVE video (I especially love the part where they do the "FLASH"!) Know ye... (the way I prefer to say, "you know..."), I am actually touched by this song? Because I feel "lost in space" right now. I LOVE the part where he sings, at the end of the chorus: "...will time remember... time remember... 'ME'!" I am NOT planning to join this Unitarian Universalist Church! Why? Because I am getting into trouble with THEM! I mean: how do you get into trouble with THEM! THEY'RE supposed to be accepting of EVERYONE! But, no! I had a sit down conversation with one of the ministers, and HE actually thinks what I am wanting to do is wrong! Personally, this just makes me laugh!




I recall, though, that Jesus did say: "Blessed are ye when men shall revile you and persecute you, and say all manner of evil falsely against you for my name's sake. Rejoice and be exceeding glad, for great is your reward in heaven - for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you."


When I listen to this song, I think of Psalm CVI.4 "Remember me, O LORD, or Jehovah, with the favour that thou bearest unto thy people: O visit me with thy salvation."




I have been waiting a long time, and I think I know who I'd like to be able to want to marry - but let me see if I can... I have to see if I've been able to move a certain mountain yet...

Another song!

Headphones! I got in at the library and was going to put ON my "headphones", and I thought: I know what song I'm going to listen to right now! By the way? I LEARNED about this song from THIS GIRL!


Blessings!


Daniel Robbins

"Not Desperate

I freely admit: I'm over forty, and at the end of my rope - but not desperate! I refuse to be! "Be of courage, and he shall strengthen your heart - all ye that hope in the LORD, or Jehovah." Psalm 31:24 (I think). I just bought another six months on Christian Café - not that I am holding my breath to find someone my own age. As far as I am concerned, I actually feel like I know whom I want to win (if not this other certain someone) (once, again, I am FINALLY able to move this "mountain"!) Other than them, I really cannot say I have any significant interest in anyone else. But that mountain (again)! As far as I know, it is still there! And - I mean - I AM moving it? But it hasn't moved yet! Therefore, I think I should be dignified enough to keep my eyes open and not put all my eggs in one basket. I mean, if I was this one individual (whom I think is the "cat's meow")? I would want ME to retain MY dignity! Not just shut down all other avenues of finding someone! So? That's where I'm at! Not desperate, but definitely "hungry" (see Proverbs 27, first six or seven verses).


Daniel - or "God is my judge"

More Church!

I stopped by "Old Paths Baptist Church", and listened to as much of the sermon as I could. Problem was: it was all about "Hel" (as prefer to call "her"). Moreover, it was obviously fallacious! Even Francis Chan and his writing partner, when they wrote the book "Erasing Hell" would have known better than to try and get away with what he was saying. I actually prayed about whether I could stay, but no way. I had to go. So I did.


Seeing I still had time, I continued on to the church where I had originally planned to visit. The sermon was much better, and told the minister so after the meeting. Then, however, I mentioned how I had walked out of Old Paths Baptist Church. Before I knew it, sorry to say it, but I was "roaring" (or, "raising my voice", as he called it). Not that I meant to be raising my voice - just that "the zeal of thine house hath eaten me up - and the reproaches of them that reproached thee are fallen upon me." Psalm 69 See? I think God is being horribly misrepresented by all this teaching on "Hel".


I simply passed on the message I had left at Old Paths Baptist Church. And it goes out to any fundamentalist or evangelical with ears to hear: "YE must be born again!" I admit: sometimes it gets wearisome - going to these churches. In fact, the minister actually asked me why I came to that church - if I did not believe "Christ" was going to burn people alive forever for not capitulating to him (he didn't put it that way, but I sure am putting it that way!) At that point I put the question back to him! Should I or should I not continue going there! When push came to shove, he said that, yes: I should keep coming.


I must say: if I didn't think God was with me, I would be one discouraged individual - but I have set my face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be ashamed. (Isaiah 50) God willing, I will go to that church tomorrow morning for 6 AM prayer.


Daniel


P.S. Again: Mountain? Move!

Church

I might actually join it, after all! And, believe me, that's a shock; even to me! I did talk to Chris, one of the ministers today, though; and he really listened to me! God willing, we will meet on the evening of the fourth day of this week - also known as "Wednesday". Not that I did not find myself discovering things about the church I do NOT in any wise agree with! Just that God lead me to join it anyway! If so, I need him to tell me in language that I can understand - but I also admit he might already be doing that. For example: the sermon. It was on "passion" - or "pass 'I' on". In other words: what are you passionate about - where you are able to most authentically able to pass "I" (in other words, yourself) on to others in a meaningful way? Well, to me? That's a no brainer... other than this mountain that, as far as I know, is still there! And, again, I am telling it to "Move!", in Jesus' name!


Love,

Daniel


"LORD, or Jehovah, my heart is not haughty - nor mine eyes lofty. Neither do I exercise myself in great matters, or in things too high for me. Surely, I have behaved and quieted myself as a child that is weaned from his mother. My soul is even as a weaned child. Let Israel hope in the LORD, or Jehovah, from henceforth and for ever." Psalm 131